I posted the other day that i was doing a wedding catering. let me tell you the story of how it went down. I was in panic mode because the couple who roped me into this project had phone me and told me they had funeral to go to…then while attending the funeral a phone call came saying a family member who was terminally ill had passed, (not a good day for them). Needless to say, they would not be able to help out with prep work the day before the wedding. I would be my self and my sister preping everything for 150 guests. Ok we can do this, we will, do this somehow.
We arrive at the church unpack and hunker down. it was a great time of chat with just my sister. time i normally do not get. When the rest of the food arrived with the recruiters later that night, i asked the impossing question….So are you able to come to the wedding? After all we were doing this for a friend of his….. But given the circumstances i wasnt going to pressure him if not. Yes he said of course and he would be with a grill too…. Amazing ! He was thrilled about the wedding….and thanked me for the works thus far.
well we finished prep by 945 pretty good 4 hours with only 2 ppl. then another test. My boys chose not to sleep well. every two hours they woke up. right till 6 am. My sister who was staying with me apparently didnt hear a thing as she normally sleeps with ear plugs as she used to be night shifter…. oh well ….
Day of event.
Smooth sailing everyone arrives on time food cooked and ready to go…even an unexpected perk of a full sized warming oven. 12:15 suppose to be coming downstairs food is on buffet tables and waiting after a couple mins we send someone upstairs to see where they are in the ceramony…..only on the solo!!!! not even signed. Apparently the pastor got off on a tangent….. we pull the dairy and hot items back for 30 min. The crowd finally came down and decended on the food. The plattered emptied on py one and we raced to refill them using almost all the purchased food, and donated squares. Until fianlly they cut the cake.
i was stressed worried if it was enough and ran from platter to platter, i glanced once or twice at the bride and talked with the groom when he came to take the few left overs home. He cried his thanks wiping away tears of joy. i nodded smiled. You know the typical thing to do. Then some one asked me if i knew the story behind the wedding, why i was here volunteering other then i agreed to it. i said no……
well first off the groom is a converted hell’s angel, who now works with street youth. They met and first date was a coffee shop. they were planning on getting married in late fall, They do love eachother madly. but her working visa expired and they wouldnt renew it. she lost her 2 jobs that was helping pay for her apt and the wedding. he got laid off last month and is on compensation. The immigration board was on her and threatened to deport her regardless of the fact she was engaged. So they talked to the pastor. he bumped the wedding and when ppl found out started helping. invitations dresses, flowers, favors, decorations, cake even you with food. they hardly put out a cent. which is good because they dont have anything.
She finished her story. and went on drying dishes the reality of it didn’t quite hit me just then. it took an hour or so of mulling it over. Of watching these ppl help clean up even though they didn’t have to. THIS IS WHAT THE CHURCH SHOULD LOOK LIKE. The village rallying round one of their own in celebration. Bringing what little they have to offer. Gift, time, cooking skills, etc. the village mentality is one of unity, not just doing just because, but out of respect love and honour. That touched me. I had never seen this in action before at any church i went to. Most of the experiences i had were fend for yourself type of places. This place where they preach that God is the center of the home, and you are the temple of the spirit, is a home. Is a family and they act like it. That day out of my selfishness i was stressed busied and to worried about work to care to look at two ppl who have nothing, but had just revived a miracle. Miracle of unity. Lord forgive me
Well its has certainly been awhile since i posted. We are in the throws of wedding preparations for a friend. I have been recruited as the caterer for this Jamaican style wedding. All things quilts, have been set aside, as the wedding is NEXT weekend.
I have been prepping trying to figure out what to serve to the growing list of guests. ok 75 pll then 100, currently sits at 150. the church kitchen is only half operational currently and does not have chinaware to use. To top it off the budget is very very limited. less then $400. eeeeeekkkkk But we will pull it off with our grace in tact ….hopefully.
But on the upside, I had creative freedom to plan the menu. The bride and groom were so happy that someone was able to help out with catering (the one they booked canceled with short notice). that they told me what ever the team could come up with was amazing
Luckly i have at my disposal a sister who, by night, caters. Farmers with a ton of local produce and a husband willing to drive me to the wholesale store
our menu sits as follows: finger food buffet.
Punch
Jamaican Jerk skewers (we have a farmer friend donating 30lbs chicken) served with cucumber dip
rice and beans cups
veg platter
shrimp or baked appetizer….
breaded mushroom (for the kids )
Chocolate & Fruit platter
Wedding Cake (made by another friend)
Tomorrow i go to the wholesale store. to pick up the napkins cups etc. Praying for sunshine, grace and for things to be delicious.
Years ago, I bought my daughter a really cute jacket at the mall. It was a hoodie made of a cuddly fabric with cream, lavender, and mint green horizontal stripes. The jacket zipped up in the front and was well crafted, stylish, and simply adorable.
When I bought it, I felt like the price on the tag was a fair one, so I gladly pulled out my wallet and paid the retail amount. I was a kid in a candy store on the way home – fully anticipating a shriek of happiness from my little bag-of-beans when I gave it to her.
Delightfully, I wasn’t disappointed. Kennedy loved her new coat, and I was pleased with my purchase. Happy dances all around… until a week later, when I saw the same jacket in the same store at a greatly reduced price. Are you tensing up with me? Suddenly, I felt schnookered! Ripped off. Taken advantage of. As soon as I saw the red line on the price tag of the unsold coats, everything changed in my mind – Kennedy’s jacket wasn’t worth what I paid for it.
When we speak of the worth of something, we often consider it to be a relative term. One that has shifting factors. For example, the jacket I bought was thirty-nine dollars, and a week later it was nineteen ninety-nine. The jacket didn’t change, but its perceived worth did.
Now, consider the worth of a woman. Are the factors that determine her value based upon variable and shifting factors or are they based upon fixed factors? Seems to be a silly question, doesn’t it? Fixed, of course! But, if the answer is so glaringly obvious, why do we struggle so much as women with feelings of worthlessness? Why do we walk around feeling like that red lined jacket? I think it’s because we often allow variable earthly factors to define our worth.
What kind of variable factors?
There are so many reasons why women feel worthless:
Because they’ve been abused (raped, molested, physically abused, verbally abused…)
Because they’ve been told that they’re worthless (by a parent, spouse, sibling, teenage child, or another…)
Because of choices they’ve made or that have been made for them (divorce, infidelity, abortion, promiscuity, eating disorders, addictions, uncontrolled anger…)
Because they’ve cheated or have been cheated on (infidelity, internet affair, pornography…)
Because they’re co-dependent (conclude their value based upon other people – “If my husband isn’t okay, I’m not okay.”)
Because they don’t collect a paycheck (stay at home moms that have left the work force, laid off employees, displaced employees, those on disability…)
Because they’re battling an illness or struggling with a disability (unable to care for family, perform basic home duties, participate in ministry or Bible study like they once did, can’t drive, cook…)
Unfortunately, the variable factors that we use to define our worth are endless. Many of us feel worthless. Why? We’ve felt ignored, invisible, insignificant, useless, undesired, ugly, unloved, or forgotten. We girls are emotional; broken in many ways. Great portions of our identity and of our personal value are wrapped into combustible packages of emotion – how we feel about this or that. The truth is, our worth has nothing to do with our feelings.
Trust me, I’m not going to try to convince you that I know everything there is to know about feeling like a woman of worth. Or about being a woman of worth. I am in the trenches with you. I struggle with normal feminine emotions and daily challenges. I don’t live a fancy schmancy, rose-colored wonder-life. I hit the snooze button several times each morning. I pack lunches for my kids. I spend countless hours of my life each year sitting in the car pool line. It’s a never-ending struggle for me to keep the laundry done and my kids often have to fish for a matching pair of socks in the clean-clothes basket. My husband is my soul mate, but is far from perfect. For that matter, Brad should win a lifetime achievement award for enduring the drama of me! Seriously. And my kids bring me both great joy and great frustration on a daily basis.
Is this sounding at all familiar to you?
See – I’m just like you, and I’m walking this faith journey right beside you. In fact, the more I know God, the less inclined I am to pretend to have life or faith figured out. Amen? I’m constantly tempted to define my worth with activities, emotions, and accomplishments. I’ve come to realize, however, that way of thinking is a spiritual dead end road. Scripture tells us that anything we do in our own strength or of our own goodness is of no value to God. “All of us have become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags” (Isaiah 64:6a).
What I do know is this: because of Jesus Christ, I’m a woman of highest worth. Not because of anything else. I’m a grace girl. Not perfect by a long stretch. I’ve been changed by the unconditional love of God and restored to perfect beauty through the shed blood of Jesus. Because of love, we are His daughters, precious in His sight. In light of this,we need to set aside feelings that diminish our value, and embrace our proper identity: Child of the King of Kings.
Hear this, friend: feelings of worthlessness are from Satan himself. It burns me up that the enemy has such a strong grip on God’s daughters in this area. We need to associate the word worthless with the word lie. That’s exactly what it is, a big, fat lie! I talk to women all the time who bend a knee to negative feelings and live defeated lives because they don’t quite know how to overcome their sense of worthlessness. God wants every one of us to experience healing and have an appropriate sense of self-worth.
So let’s go back to Kennedy’s new coat for just a moment. Imagine walking into God’s department store. There on the rack, you spy a coat that is just plain fabulous – I mean stop-you-in-your-tracks fabulous! One-size fits all, the tag reads. Yeah, right, you whisper under your breath. Then you flip over the price tag and it’s crazy expensive. Way beyond what you could ever dream of paying. Like, if you added up every dollar that ever passed through your hands – then multiplied that by ten thousand – that kind of expensive. Then imagine the storeowner walking over to you, slipping the coat off the rack and onto your shoulders.
“It’s a perfect fit,” He smiles.
“Sir,” you manage with a whisper, “I could never afford such a coat. This is meant for royalty and I’m, well, just an ordinary girl.”
“Oh precious woman, this coat is made especially for you, and the price has already been paid in full.”
As the owner straightens the sleeves on your arms and adjusts the collar around your neck, you notice his hands – nail pierced hands. And suddenly you realize that this is the covering you were meant to wear all along.
You see, the Bible tells us that because of what Jesus did on the cross, we can be clothed with the “robe of righteousness.” The apostle Paul tells us that when we are reconciled to God, we become His righteousness. “God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God” (2 Corinthians 5:21).There’s no way we could ever afford or earn such a robe but Jesus gave His life for us – He earned it for us. He paid the price and we receive the gift. Why? Because you’re worth it.You are precious and highly valuable in the eyes of the One who sees. And you never, never, never have to worry about being on anyone’s bargain rack again.
Holy Father, I’m humbled to be viewed as precious in Your eyes. Thank You for taking on my sin so that I could take on your righteousness. Please help me to see myself as You see me. Help me to thrive in Your beauty as a woman of worth! In Jesus’s name, amen.
RESPONSE TIME: Ready to put your emotions in their proper place? Leave this comment of God-confidence below: “I am a woman of worth!” Additionally, post a prayer needor let me know what the Lord is taught you or reminded you about through this post.
Thanks for doing life with me, Gwen
** This post is an excerpt from my book Broken into Beautiful. My full testimony is featured in the book, along with Scriptural truths and stories of how God has brought restoration the hearts of many other women who had painful life wounds. God delights to transform lives … including your own. Experience God’s healing and hope in your life today as you read Broken Into Beautiful! **
***Here’s a song that I co-wrote with the same title as my book, Broken into Beautiful. If you connected with the content of this post, then you will connect with the message of the song.***
My first silent auction quilt will be underway soon. Planned for Everglade Ministry Conference, (details soon to be made publicly avil…) The theme of the confrence is unity, networking and the might works of God’s hand.
I saw this fabric above and googled (not the internet way either lol) i fell in love with it. i wondered round for about an hour trying to find just the right fabric to go with it…..i found it a greenish tan, with slightly darker scripting of horticultural words . like a diary. i matched it with a sage green to pull all three together.
This will be my first quilt for sale, and i am a lil nervious but excited. I made up one block today just to see what the effect would be and it looks reaaaaaallllllly nice. The only issue i ran into is that the panel is not truly sq. I will have to create the illusion of sq.
Well i am back everyone ! My tech fast is over and now i am reflecting on what i learned accomplished …didnt accomplish and everything in between…….
I had a personal goal of going completly tech free for 21 days …..to be completly honest i didnt quite make it. My plan was no TV dvd lap top cell microwave (easy we dont own one). well i have never been one for “finishing” things my quilts are pretty much the only things that get finished.
For Example we will have a laundry, i will wash it dry it throw it on the couch ….then get tired or need to run out to grab somn and it sits there …..for like a few days. Luckly i have a husband or my house would be in “half cleaned – got distracted shambles….”
So what did i learn……. besides the fact that i cannot stick to things i set out to do….
1) people dont use the phone…..why do i own one?
2) people actauly start telling meaningful things in person, deepening real relationships
3) People visit more…(i have had 3 visits in one wk may not seem like alot but to us that is BIG)
4) I didnt loose my temper as often with my kids ….yes i do that …..
5) I like my garden, I did crafts and made play dough
6) i realized who went out of their way to involve me …no fb invites here
But most of all i think i realized that i dont have to be perfect to do what God wants…. And God wants me to accept who I am in HIM…..a divine daughter of the King. See i had no role male model that could display love, none that would speak it. So how could i know what God’s unconditional love possibly be without ever feeling the love of a male parent…..
I couldnt, i felt like i talked to the ceiling most nights. i felt distant and overlooked. As i prayed during this fast, God placed ppl in my path that told me God was already inside me why did i try and talk to the ceiling? I should commune with the heart…HIS heart and mine…..sounds all pretty simple most christians go yah yah i have heard that ……but have you felt it? My honest answer was no….
During this fasting time came Easter…..i was in charge of the costumes, 10 yrs old was to play Jesus….i made his robe. I realzed while doing this that i was doing the same thing as the Mother mary….making clothes for my son’s, for little boys, for the child Jesus…..I knew that it had to be speical from my heart just as what she would do with her own boy…Jesus! i realized in that moment the mothers matter. That my job, matters. and i felt love……
The next day i tested it on the boy fit like a glove and then the director turned to me and said….ok now destroy the robe…..WHAT? DESTROY it? NO WAY! ……i just spent hours making it perfect…from my heart. ….. but it had to be done, as this boy was Jesus and thus would walk in his shoes. My heart was crushed as i literally dragged the beautiful robe on the street to get the dirt affect, I cringed as i took a razor ….slashing here and there……and lastly i locked my bathroom door so my young family wouldnt see the blood i painted ….i was a very realistic job. Any director would have been proud……but i felt sick. I did this…..Me….. There was still so much in my life i had left “undelt with” covered up…… lied about for shame…..
And to feel as Mary did watching her lil boy….. even in a small amount ……what happened that day broke me like no easter i have ever experianced. Some one once told me That the love i have for my sons……and i do love my sons…….take that times that by 1 million and that is how much God loves me…. that he would go that far as to sacrifice another to gain me…as if i was a hostage.
I final had a visual, then a feeling, fianlly a small understanding, of the “father’s Love.” I thought of my sons now 3 & 2….i though how if anything happened to them i would be crushed….i thought of how they are my blessings from God. My love for them cannot be measured and i do not love one less then the other. They are different in their own ways, they like different things, act differently, get in trouble differently. Why would it be different with us….children of God. then i though of how immeasurable his love must REALLY be …..
1 John 4:7-8Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.
i cried, closed the bible, and turned my stove on to make a cup of tea……….
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